A look into a month's cycle

I hope you're not squeamish or embarrass easy, because there's gonna be a lot of those kinds of words in here.  So I thought that I would give you a little glimpse into what a month is like for someone that is going through infertility treatments.  This is my own experience, and of course, will be a bit different for everyone.  But this is fairly typical-ish for PCOS treatments.

Every day I take Metformin.  Typically a med for diabetes, it's helpful for PCOS because one of the causes of PCOS is the inability to regulate insulin properly.  It also is supposed lower the risk of miscarriages in women with PCOS.  I also take thyroid meds.  My thyroid levels are too high, meaning my thyroid is working too hard.  Regulating your thyroid is important, whether you're trying to conceive or not.  I also take Folgard.  That is a folic acid supplement-it's like mega folic acid and B-12.  I take this because of the MTHFR gene mutation I have.  I don't absorb folic acid correctly and this is supposed to help with that.

Cycle Day (CD) 1-This is when your period starts.  It's important that you know this not just for your treatment, but also if you do get pregnant, you'll have a timeline to go on.  Generally you'll call your infertility doc and have your meds to help you ovulate prescribed.  Chlomid is the most common.  There are others.  I'm on Femara which was not developed for infertility issues but is proving to be beneficial.

CD 2-4-It depends on who you are, but these are typical PMS days-cranky, painful, tired...if you're a woman or know a woman, you know these are the days to NOT say anything about the chocolate bar she just ate or the Lifetime movie she's watching.

CD 5-9-These are the days you take your meds to help you to ovulate.  While sometimes metformin on it's own will do that, for a lot of women, it's not enough.  These meds tend to have some pretty ugly side effects.  Your hormones are all over the place.  Those of you that have spent any time with me while I've been on those meds knows that the hot flashes and food cravings are ridiculous.  And the nausea.  Since I've switched from Chlomid to Femara, the side effects have lessened, but they are still there and seem to be getting a little worse the more months I'm on it.  Of course, just like with anything, your body chemistry will factor into what kind of side effects you have.

CD 10-11-Time to buy the ovulation predictor kit, or OPK.  These basically tell you whether you are getting ready to ovulate by measuring the luteinizing hormone (LH).  Just before ovulation, there is a surge in this hormone and that is what the OPK detects.  

CD 12-16-This is the time during the cycle that most women will ovulate.  When the OPK shows a surge, it's time to place a call to the doc.  It's time for the Intra-uterine insemination (IUI).  Sometimes when you go in, they will do an ultrasound, internal for those of you that don't know, to check to see if you have ovulated for sure.  Those are made even more exciting when your ovaries, which float free, hide behind your uterus.  The IUI is just what it sounds like.  They take your partner's sperm, do what's called a sperm wash (taking out all of the no good sperm, do a count, measure motility) and then inseminate you. For patients like me this is important because on top of all these other things, I have severe scarring on my cervix.  Several years ago they had to remove a portion of it due to pre-cancerous cells.  (On a scale of 1-10, 10 being cancer, I was about a 9 1/2.)  

CD 17-30-Ah, the wait.  This is the longest 2 weeks of your life.  Until next month when you do it again.  If you're lucky, some time towards the end of these 2 weeks you'll take a pregnancy test and it will be positive.  But if not, this is when your heart breaks.  You build up this hope all month long that this is going to be the month that it happens.  You say your prayers and you have your friends and family say their prayers too.  Seeing a negative is like letting the air out of a balloon.  There is no way to explain the disappointment and heartache.

That's a look into a typical month for me.  I wish I could convey the mental exhaustion.  I wish I could put into words how tired you feel....not just mentally, but physically.  This affects everything.  It's what you think about when you wake up.  It's what you think about when you cry yourself to sleep at night.  This is real.  It's like the movie Groundhog Day, only instead of repeating just one day, you repeat the whole month.